My Homework

[revised 9/2016]

Every teacher has heard wonderful homework stories and many of us have made them up. Here are some suggestions.

My Homework?! Of COURSE I Did It!

…by Doktah McSteviePoo

All night with pen I strove to craft
for you a perfect tome
Perhaps twas when I tripped and fell
The pages slipped into a well.
‘cause bosom clasped I’m sure they were,
when I left hearth and home.

Afterwards I can’t be sure
A killer dog, all fangs and fur
Leapt for my throat and tried to bite.
I guess my work slipped out of sight.

I would have stopped if I had known
and let that dog chew to the bone.
My work was swell
Each part complete
You would have had a wondrous treat

I can’t believe you missed the chance
Maybe it was the avalanche.

Snow piled nearly to the sky
And it let loose as I walked by
Stones and slush came crashing down
It must have wiped out half the town.

At least it scared that dog away.
The things I’ve had to face today!

But wait, I’m sure I had it when
I headed off to school again
Sure each word was spelled just right
When suddenly – a blinding light

Sizzling fire drove me back
Oh NO!!! An alien attack!
I ran down streets stained red with blood.
Thought I was safe, but then a flood!

A wall of wet crashed over me
My homework, where? I couldn’t see.
I swept up on a sunny beach
My homework lay just within reach.

I scooped it up and headed here
But then I felt a flash of fear

Some cannibals caught sight of me
They grabbed their pots.
I had to flee.

Arrows, slings, I dodged them all.
To turn my paper in on time
And show you all my work sublime
Perhaps it slipped out in the hall.

Teacher dear, you’ll never will know. How deep and wide my sorrow.
‘Tis not for naught I beg you wait,
I’ll bring it in tomorrow.